Recently, I was meeting with a regular client — an entrepreneur and really successful business woman who was experiencing, through circumstances beyond her control, a situation that forced her to slow down her usually active pace. She was a woman who was used to being constantly on the go: sometimes struggling with finding a healthy work/life balance and unable to make the time and space to slow down on her own. She and I had been working together for months, and yet she was still unable to slow down until a shift in her environment forced her to do so. But instead of feeling relief from this newfound slower pace, she was actually experiencing a lot of anxiety — worried about the decreased income that might result from her taking a break, and concerned over whether or not she’d be able to later re-generate the income she’d previously had.
Later, I met with another client — another badass boss lady experiencing similar feelings of anxiety. But this time, her feelings were coming from an opportunity to increase her pace and workload. Instead of fearing what would happen if she was forced to slow down, she was worried over what could happen if she were to pick up the pace — afraid she might not be able to maintain a healthy work/life balance, that she might lose some of the freedom her current schedule allowed, or that once she joined the hectic rat race, she might never be able to stop striving for more.
Two women, both extremely talented and very successful, struggling with the same feelings of worry and anxiety, but for two completely different reasons. So that got me thinking…
Entrepreneurship — building, running, and growing your businesses — is just like driving a car.
Do I sound crazy? Let me explain.
Chances are if you’re over 16-years-old and don’t live in a city that runs on public transportation, you know how to drive a car. You’ve probably been driving for years. So, you understand that the purpose of driving is to get you from Point A to Point B. You also understand that when you drive, you have full control of the speed at which you travel.
I’ll repeat that: as the driver of your car, you have full control over the speed at which you travel.
Makes sense, right? As the driver of your car, you can choose your speed. Maybe you’re riding the freeway and can kick it up to 75 mph. Or, maybe you’re cruising down a quiet, residential street and prefer to keep the speedometer hovering around 20 mph. Maybe you’re driving along somewhere in the middle, with your favorite song playing on the radio. Whatever the case may be, you’re the driver. When you want to speed up, you press down on the gas pedal. When you’re ready to slow down, you pump the breaks a few times. If you’ve reached a speed you want to maintain for the next 150 miles, you kick back into cruise control and enjoy the steady rhythm of the road. In the driver’s seat, it’s all up to you.
So why don’t we allow ourselves to follow this same logic in our business lives?
Often, for high performing business women, there is a belief that once we slow down, we’ll never be able to accelerate back to the pace we were maintaining before. There’s strong resistance to slowing down and taking breaks — fueled by the idea that if we’re not constantly on the go and always in the hustle, we’re never going to be able to speed up again. But this is crazy! The mindset that we’re not in control of our speed is a limiting belief. Just like driving a car, if you’re able to slow down, you’ll also be able to accelerate right back up — and both options are always available to you, as long as you’re in the driver’s seat.
But what about things that happen that are out of our control?
Sometimes these things come up when we’re on the road, right? Sometimes our car breaks down, sometimes there’s an accident or traffic that forces us to slow down, sometimes the road we’re traveling on is closed and we have to take a detour, sometimes we’re even in the accident. Sometimes, for better or for worse, the unexpected happens.
But do we quit driving all of a sudden just because we’ve hit a roadblock (sometimes, literally)? No, we don’t. What we do is problem solve: we accept the delay, we pull a map out of the glove compartment, we fix the car, we might even have to replace the car — but one way or another, we keep on driving.
We should treat our business lives in the exact same way: by problem solving, doing what needs to be done, repairing what needs to be repaired, and replacing what needs to be replaced. We stay in the driver’s seat of our business. We figure it out. We make it from Point A to Point B. We don’t let fear of the unknown, fear of failure, or fear of our own pace prevent us from getting in the car and driving.
But I’ll admit, sometimes that’s easier said than done. So here are some tips to keep you on the road and driving — in the driver’s seat, at your own pace:
Whenever you start to feel stuck in your business, struggling with feelings of fear, anxiety, or stress — and believe me, it happens to all of us — tell yourself that running your business is just like driving your car. You already know everything you need to know to be successful, you just have to do it. You can speed up, slow down, stop, change direction, take a detour, or pull into the service garage for a little tune up. Whatever you do in your driver’s seat is fully in your control. Even when the unexpected happens, keep both hands steady on the wheel and know that you’ve got this. You know how to drive, you know how to get where you’re going, and your destination is bound to be great.
For more advice on taking control of your life and business, be sure to watch the video that accompanies this blog post and check out my Facebook group Alpha Female Sisterhood. There you’ll find tons of tips, advice, empowerment, and support for high-performing women, just like you!
Tapping into Your Masculine And Feminine Energies: The Benefits Of Finding Balance
Take a moment to think about the energy you bring into your work, your relationships, and your daily life. You might see yourself as very driven, always getting things done and looking forward to that next big goal. Or, maybe you would describe yourself as less task-oriented and more go-with-the-flow: you lead with your heart rather than your brain, and trust the universe to take over. Perhaps you fall somewhere in the middle, bringing a taskmaster energy to certain areas of your life, and staying a little more hands-off in others.
These different, dynamic energies are known as our masculine energy and our feminine energy — and every single one of us, regardless of whether we identify as male, female, transgender, or gender-neutral, each contain “masculine energy” and “feminine energy” inside of us. But, let’s be clear: even though the language we use to describe these energies falls within the gender binary, whether or not someone has more “masculine energy” or “feminine energy” has nothing to do with their gender identity, sexuality, masculinity, or femininity. In fact, these dual energies aren’t even limited to people. Once you begin to understand the nature of masculine and feminine energy, start to pay attention to what’s around you: there is masculine energy and feminine energy everywhere; found in animals and plants, minerals and magnetic poles, atomic particles — really, everything. And this energy can help influence how you exist in the world.
Let’s start by looking at what we mean when we say “masculine energy” or “feminine energy.” Typical qualities of masculine energy include:
In other words, masculine energy is the energy that gets things done — it hustles, strives, it hunts, it makes things happen. Masculine energy is the doing energy, or the action energy.
Qualities of feminine energy, on the other hand, include:
Feminine energy is grounding. It holds space, attracts, and nurtures. Feminine energy surrenders to the flow and trusts the unfolding of the universe. But don’t be fooled: feminine energy is not passive, inactive, or weak. It’s simply a different way of expressing power in the world.
Consider this example: water flows — just like energy, right? Think about the energy of building a dam, designed to direct the flow of water in a certain way. That dam is an example of masculine energy. But now, think about what happens when water follows its natural flow. Over time, that water is able to shape rocks, making its way through boulders and carving large canyons into the earth. The power of that natural flow is an example of feminine energy — that energy goes with the flow (literally!) and surrenders, but still makes a lasting impact.
But while a dam can be all-masculine energy, and a natural river can be all-feminine energy, it’s a little more complicated in us humans. Since people have both masculine and feminine energy within us, our goal is to balance those dual energies — and to be honest, a lot of us struggle to find that balance.
I’ll offer you an example from my own experience:
Throughout the first 30-plus years of my life, I was driven by my masculine energy — the goal was always to get things done, be high performing, achieve straight A’s, attend graduate school, get a good job, earn promotions, be a leader, perform better than others, be considered “one of the best” of whatever it was I was doing. Each of those are motivations driven by masculine energy, and I identified with that masculine energy a lot.
But over time, particularly over the past few years, I began a journey of personal and spiritual growth. Through my own study and exploration, and by working with life and business coaches of my own, I began to learn how to embrace the feminine energy that was also within me: the energy that nurtures, trusts, surrenders, and is comfortable going with the flow and letting things naturally unfold. For too long I had been concerned with out-performing and over-analyzing, and it was time to tune into more of my feeling nature, connecting with my intuition and my intellect.
Then, as I started leading my life with more feminine energy, the people around me noticed something was changing. My business evolved from one of a strict fitness-focus into the life and business coaching and spiritual mentorship that I offer today. I found myself helping men and women who are going through the same journey that I went through. And, quite naturally, the energy I was putting out into the world began to return to me with greater abundance. Not insignificantly, as my business evolved my income actually doubled. Everything just felt better, in both my personal life and my business life — all because I worked to balance my masculine energy and my feminine energy.
So now you might be wondering: what happens if you’re like me; your energies are unbalanced and you’re more masculine energy-heavy? People weighing heavily towards masculine energy are typically those who are already performing at very high levels — you’re probably making money, getting results, and finding success. From the outside, those around you probably think that you have absolutely no difficulty getting things done — you never miss deadlines, you’re never overwhelmed, you’re just amazing. But from the inside, that might not be the whole story.
The symptoms of struggling with too much masculine energy include:
No matter how successful you might appear from the outside, inside you’ve probably asked yourself: ‘is this it?’ or ‘is this all I have to live for?’. You may have the sense that there is more out there for you, but you’re not quite sure how to tap into it.
All of these feelings result from an imbalance between your masculine and feminine energy, and so the goal now is to bring more feminine energy into your work and business and your life. Consider starting from a space of gratitude (and I offer some great tips on starting a gratitude practice, which might help). From that space of gratitude, really check in with yourself. Notice what your heart is telling you, tap into your intuition, and start letting the voice of your heart speak louder than the voice of your brain. If you’re used to only letting your masculine energy drive you, this might be difficult at first. But the key is to trust: believe in the universe, trust things will work out, allow yourself to feel supported, and really go with the flow. Refrain from over thinking, over-analyzing, and planning multiple scenarios out in your mind. Just surrender.
Soon, you’ll probably start to notice a sense of purpose growing within you. You may find a greater sense of meaning and more fulfillment in your work and life. You’ll begin to feel more nurtured and supported — both by yourself and by those around you. Feelings of pressure and stress, and always believing it’s you up against the world will begin to drain away. Then your hustle — the important, meaningful work that you do — will yield better results while feeling increasingly effortless. Things will start falling into place naturally. You’ll start to manifest without feeling like you have to completely deplete yourself of energy in order to do so.
But, there’s another side to this as well. What about those of us who are weighted with more feminine energy? If this sounds like you, then you probably have a clarity of purpose for your life and business — you're passionate, you know what you’re doing and why you’re doing it, and you love what you do. There’s a clear alignment between your passion and your purpose, you often feel inspired, and you’re able to nurture, give to others, and change people’s lives. You probably experience gratitude.
But, too much feminine energy can lead to some challenges as well, including:
For those with an over-abundance of feminine energy, you may feel like your efforts to help others are making them successful, but you’re not yet empowered to have your own success. You may feel like you’re not getting the respect or credit you deserve for your efforts, or like your voice is not being heard.
If this sounds like you, then you know it’s time to bring some more masculine energy into your work and life, finding a balance between your passion and your productivity. As you start to balance the feminine energy with the masculine, you’ll grow more focused, get more grounded, start taking productive and methodical actions, and become more accountable to your tasks and deadlines. You’ll start delivering more tangible results, and by doing so, start yielding more tangible results as well — bringing more success and abundance into your life, perhaps even growing in your business and becoming empowered to take on a leadership position of your own.
As an intuitive life and business coach and a spiritual mentor, I’ve seen firsthand — both in my own life and in the lives and businesses of my clients — the change that can happen when we really work to balance our innate, dual energies. For more information on how to balance your masculine and feminine energies, and to watch the live video that accompanies this blog post, be sure to check out my Facebook group Alpha Female Sisterhood. There you’ll find tons of empowerment and support for high-performing women, just like you!
Finding Your Flow and Passion
Have you watched The Matrix?
The Matrix is by far one of my favorite movies (the original one only of course, the sequels are just garbage, but that's another blog post).
In the movie, Morpheus gives a choice to Neo: "You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."
Neo of course takes the red pill, and finds out the true nature of the matrix, his true soul purpose, and goes into training to fight the war against machines, save humanity, all that cool superhero stuff.
One part of the movie that always resonated a lot with me is when Cipher talks about how he regrets taking the red pill, because he found that the true, free life he lives outside of the matrix was actually pretty hard & exhausting. "I'm tired. Tired of this war, tired of fighting... I'm tired of the ship, being cold, eating the same goddamn goop everyday... If you'd told us the truth, we would've told you to shove that red pill right up your ass."
I think his sentiment really plays to our fear that I see and hear often from my clients.
The fear of making a wrong choice. What if we decide on something that we think would give us freedom or change in our lives, but then we find out the choice we made was a mistake? What if it were a bad decision and there was no turning back?
I think the same fear and sentiment applies to people who want to become more spiritually aware, more connected to their true self and purpose.
What if we found our true selves and learned our soul purpose, and then found it to be depressing and difficult?
But in my opinion, that's where the movie is just a movie.
The real question to ask is, "How would I live my life if I had the clarity and freedom to be all I could be, in the same world I live in? How fearless, open, loving would I be?"
Because here’s the thing.
Connecting with our true self, learning our soul purpose, and living our lives from that authentic place is not like The Matrix; it's actually more like when Dorothy lands in Oz. More colorful, more magical, more exciting. (Click below to see that magical scene in The Wizard of Oz)
You don't believe me? Then you will just have to see it for yourself. You can connect to your true self and purpose and live a life that is more grounded to who you truly are by learning to tap into your own intuition, and using your intuition to help you with your life and business.
"You can explore and take your first few steps inside my Facebook group: Alpha Female Sisterhood
Take your red pill, come join me, and I will show you the way. I promise more Oz, less Matrix. Come on!
Your Energy and Productivity: Tips For Tapping Into Your Energy Centers, Aligning Your Chakras, And Enhancing Productivity In Your Daily Life
Have you ever wondered how to use your energy to be more productive in your daily life? I’m not just talking about the jolt of energy you get from your morning coffee on the way to work — although sure, that helps too! What I’m really talking about is the energy already inherent within you: your physical being, but also your spiritual, vibrational being as well. By tapping into and aligning the energy centers in your body, mind, and spirit, you can actually enhance and improve your productivity. Here, I’ll teach you how to discover those energy centers, align them, and then harness that energy towards becoming a happier, healthier, and more productive you.
The fact is, everything in the world is energy — anything that is a physical being is energy. On a basic, biological level, the calories that you consume and then burn are energy. The work that you do is energy. Money is an exchange of energy, as are all kinds of other resources you use. But while your physical being is comprised of electronic molecules of energy, the things you don’t see are also energy: your thoughts and emotions, your goals and aspirations, your vibration and manifestations. The goal is to align these unseen forms of energy with the physical energy centers within your body — once you learn to manage your own energy it can be like having a superpower, one that helps you live your life to the fullest!
Let’s start by considering the energy of your body. Maybe you’ve heard the term chakra before: the centers of psychic, spiritual energy in the human body. There are thought to be seven chakras in the body — each representing a different aspect of your inherent energy — and knowing how to work with your chakras can help with both your energy and your productivity.
Although each chakra has a focal point within the physical body, the chakras themselves are not physical elements of the body, but rather energetic ones, and chakra energy generates from the bottom up. The first, known as the root chakra, can be found at the base of the spine. The root chakra — or Muladhara, in the traditional Sanskrit — is associated with the color red and produces a grounding energy. The emotion or mantra behind the root chakra is “I am.” If you’re not balanced in this chakra, you may feel stuck or unable to move forward. Actions taken may, unfortunately, turn out to be a waste your time.
The second chakra is the sacral chakra — Svadhishthana — associated with the color orange. Located in your pelvis, the sacral chakra is centered around creativity and the expression “I feel.” The sacral chakra is also where your flexibility comes from. If you’re not balanced in this chakra you might end up blocking your energy flow instead of adapting, finding balance, being creative, and moving forward. When the sacral chakra is blocked, you might also find yourself rigid and resistant to change.
The third chakra, the solar plexus chakra, is located in your naval region, right under your ribs. This third chakra — or Manipura — is represented by the color yellow and is associated with your personal power, life purpose, and self-confidence. The sacral chakra is the “I do” chakra, and when you’re aligned in this chakra you get shit done! If you’re too strong in this chakra, however, you might find yourself becoming more aggressive. On the flip side, if you’re weaker in the solar plexus chakra, you might struggle with indecision and timidity, or find difficulty stepping into your true power and full potential.
The fourth chakra — your Anahata chakra — is located at your heart center. This chakra is associated with the color green and is where the energy you put into passion projects, love, and relationships is generated. The emotion or mantra for this chakra is, not surprisingly, “I love.” If you’re aligned with your heart chakra you will be in tune with your purpose and feel good in your heart. You’ll find inspiration and motivation. If you’re not in balance with this chakra, you might struggle with feeling unfulfilled.
The fifth chakra is the throat chakra — or Vishuddha — blue in color and associated with the phrase “I speak.” This is where your energy for speaking, listening, and communicating generates. If you’re not balanced in your throat chakra, you’ll find it difficult to communicate what it is you want or need, or how to most effectively deliver your message.
The sixth, third eye chakra — Ajna -- is represented by the color indigo and is located in the center of your forehead. The mantra behind this third eye chakra is “I see.” When your Ajna chakra is balanced you’ll find success through goal setting, brainstorming, and envisioning long-range ambitions for your work and life. When your third eye chakra is not balanced, you might feel flighty, distracted, untethered, or unrealistic. You could take on more than is manageable or aspire too far beyond what your capabilities are right now.
The seventh and final chakra is the crown chakra — violet or purple in color and known as Sahasrara. This is the topmost chakra in the energic body, located just above the crown of your head. This crown chakra is where your intuition comes from: your connection to your higher self and purpose. If this chakra is unbalanced you may feel misaligned and uninspired. You may also end up being too hard on yourself — struggling to recognize when you’ve achieved a goal or done a good job.
Take a moment now to think about these seven chakras. Are there one or two you identify with over the others? Are there any in which you feel you’re not aligned? If so, don’t worry — you’re not alone. I’ve felt misaligned at times in my own life as well. I know that when I worked at a corporate job, even though I was making a lot of money and working with great people, I still felt deep down inside that it wasn’t my calling. I wasn’t aligned with my true higher self.
This is how your productivity can suffer — if your energy centers aren’t aligned, you’ll struggle to feel disconnected for your higher self or your true purpose. So now, the question is: how do we work with our own energy to improve our productivity?
We balance our chakras of course!
When it comes to balancing and aligning chakras, it’s typical to find that some people are stronger in the lower chakras, while others identify more closely with the higher chakras. This can often shift and fluctuate throughout your life as well — depending on what is going on in your work, in your personal life, or in your heart or spiritual life, your chakras can become unbalanced, strengthening in some areas and weakening in others.
For many of us Alpha women, it’s common to experience issues with our lower chakras — when the lower chakras become unbalanced, you might not be grounded enough. This can make it difficult for you to feel rooted in your truth or to be assertive and secure in your decision making — two things that can create all kinds of extra work and wasted efforts in your life. You might become easily distracted or find other projects to work on, instead of focusing on the ones that will serve yourself and your business better!
Once you’re feeling grounded — balanced, and protected in your energetic boundaries — it’s time to consider ways to raise your vibration, and keep your vibration up. Just like a car you, want to maintain your vibration and keep it running.
Here are six easy tips:
I hope these methods help you to discover your energy centers, align that energy, raise your vibration, and keep your productivity flowing smoothly. Getting both grounded and aligned is sure to help you with your business, your projects, and of course, your day-to-day life!
For more information on tapping into your chakras, balancing and channeling your energy, and naturally raising your vibration, be sure to watch the video that accompanies this blog post and check out my Facebook group Alpha Female Sisterhood. There you’ll find tons of tips, advice, empowerment, and support for high-performing women, just like you!
Related Posts: Time is Money or Time is Love?
Anyone working on growing a Gratitude Practice knows that practicing gratitude is not always easy. At the same time, you also might be looking for ways to deepen your Gratitude Practice — both of which we’re going to explore here. If you’re unfamiliar with the practice and haven’t had a chance to read **Gratitude Practice: How To Start One And Why You Should, Right Now, be sure to begin there! You’ll find everything you need to know about what a Gratitude Practice is, how to start one, and why you’ll love it.
If you’ve already started to explore you own Gratitude Practice, then you might have begun to notice some benefits right away: reduced stress and increased sense of calm, improved focus and clarity, a decrease in your “lack mindset”, boosted resilience, and even better sleep! By writing down those things you are grateful for each day, you’re bound to feel healthier and happier — finding that happiness raises your vibration, helping you become even more joyful.
But it’s also true that there can be obstacles to a Gratitude Practice, and that’s what I’m going to talk about today. If you’re currently struggling, or have struggled in the past when attempting to write what you’re thankful or grateful for, don’t worry — that’s totally normal.
These could be some reasons why:
1.You might be too focused on the results of your Gratitude Practice, rather than the practice itself. Maybe you’re writing your daily lists, but you’re not emotionally resonating with the things you’re truly thankful for. You might start judging the quality of your list, concerned that some of the items aren’t “worthy” of your gratitude, or even feeling pressured that you have to write the best list! This is when it’s time to take a step back, and reconnect with your intention for starting a Gratitude Practice in the first place. What is most important, when you’re writing your list, is truly feeling thankful in your heart of hearts, and experiencing real gratitude. You’ll know the difference, and I assure you it will not disappoint!
2.Another common mistake is that you might only write in your gratitude journal when really cool things happen, or just once or twice a week. Maybe you think your life is boring or, again, the things you’re grateful for aren’t really worth that much gratitude. All this serves to do is deprive yourself of all the thankful joy you could be feeling. Remember: practice gratitude with nonjudgement. If you’re grateful for something, no matter how big or small it might seem, then it’s definitely worth writing down!
3.You might be concerned that you’re writing the same things down each day. But remember: the only person you’re making this list for is you. As long as you write from your heart you cannot go wrong, I promise. If you’re including things like being thankful for your health, your job, or your children every day, great! It is okay to repeat what you’re thankful for every day because it’s not about what you put on the list, it’s about your commitment to the practice and how it makes you feel!
4.You’re afraid your Gratitude Practice is a passing fad — lots of people are doing it, and it’s going to be in-and-out like the latest trendy diet. Believe me when I say A Gratitude Practice is not a fad. It’s something that works and that everyone should be excited to try!
Now that you’ve laid the foundation of your Gratitude Practice, and even started to work out some of the kinks, you might be ready to take your practice to the next level. Here are three ways to amp up your gratitude practice!
1.When you write what you’re thankful for, always add why you’re thankful for it. For example: “I am thankful for my eyes, because they allow me to see the beauty of the world around me, as well as my husband.”
2.Try self-gratitude. For every few items you include on your list, consider adding a few relating to yourself as well. It is very easy to be thankful for the things around us, like our family, our house and lots of other external things. It’s not always as easy to look inward, and find gratitude there. So, you could write something like: “I’m thankful for my sense of humor, because…”. Notice the difference between gratitude and self-gratitude, and see how your practice might begin to transform!
3.This can be a tricky one: find gratitude for the situations, people, or things that are bringing challenges into your life at this moment. (I told you!) We all have things in our lives that pose difficulties for us, or that bring our vibrations down. Maybe you’re dealing with a difficult coworker, a tough family relationship, or a financial issue. In these moments, really tune in and try to be thankful for that situation. You could write: “I’m thankful for my difficult client because they’re helping me learn and grow, next time I’ll know how to choose my client more carefully.” It’s like that old expression: we can look at things as enemies, or we can look at them as teachers.
Remember, no matter where you are in your Gratitude Practice, there is no one right or wrong way to practice gratitude. If you’re just beginning your practice, try to stick with it for at least 21 days — the experts say it takes at least 3 weeks to create a good habit! If you’ve already got a regular Gratitude Practice, I hope this information helps you along in your journey.
For more information on starting your own Gratitude Practice, and to watch the live video that accompanies this blog post, be sure to check out my Facebook group Alpha Female Sisterhood. There you’ll find tons of empowerment and support for high-performing women, just like you!
**Gratitude Practice: How To Start One And Why You Should, Right Now
As a life and business coach, I’ve learned the importance of having a personal Gratitude Practice. Today, I want to share with you some information about starting a Gratitude Practice — where to begin, why you should do it, and the amazing benefits you’ll discover once you do!
Many of you are probably already familiar with the term “gratitude practice.” Maybe you’ve read about the benefits of gratitude or know someone who keeps a Gratitude Practice. Maybe you’ve even thought about starting one of your own! But even if you’ve never heard the term “gratitude practice” — or, “gratitude journaling” — before, don’t worry. I’ll walk you through everything you need to know. After all the benefits I’ve seen in my own life, I’m so excited to be able to share this amazing practice with you!
Here are the basics:
1. To get started, all you have to do is write down a list of things you are thankful for each day. You might want to dedicate a special journal to your gratitude practice — something that will make you look forward to writing your daily list. Some people write down 5 things, or 10, or even more. But even if you can only think of a few, setting aside the time to write those things down is important! It’s the key to helping you create the habit. You might even find that the more you develop the habit of a Gratitude Practice, the longer each of your lists become!
2. Know that there really is no right or wrong way to perform a Gratitude Practice. It doesn’t matter what time of the day you write or where you are when you do. Don’t feel like you need to create a formal, meditative space before beginning — that might come naturally, later! What’s most important is your commitment to writing down the things you’re thankful for, each day.
3. Don’t overthink it. For example, let’s say you’ve made yourself a gratitude journal, but you don’t have it with you when the mood to celebrate your Gratitude Practice strikes. Do it anyway! Just write what you’re grateful for on a piece of paper or type it into a note on your phone. You can always transfer it over to your journal later on. (And speaking of that journal, let’s try to stay away from perfectionism here. Don’t overanalyze your neatness, handwriting, spelling, or grammar. Perfectionism is one of the easiest ways to harm your Practice.)
4. Approach your Gratitude Practice with non-judgement, (aka: don’t have a snobby attitude about it). Once you begin your Gratitude Practice, you might start to notice that tons of other people have jumped on the gratitude bandwagon as well — celebrities and yoga instructors, your friends and co-workers. This isn’t a bad thing! Everyone is doing it because it works.
5. Try to stick with your Gratitude Practice for at least 21 days. Experts say it takes no less than 3 weeks to create a good habit.
Developing my own Gratitude Practice has become one of my biggest tools for changing my mindset — and that changed mindset has changed my life, as well as how I run my business. But my experience is just the beginning.
Here are some of the other benefits of starting a Gratitude Practice:
1. Reduced Stress and Increased Sense of Calm
Did you know that there’s actual scientific evidence for the benefits of gratitude journaling? Studies have shown that the practice can measurably reduce stress and give you a sense of calm!
2. Improved Focus and Clarity
Entering the space of mindfulness created by gratitude journaling will help you stay focused, grounding you in the present moment (or the “here and now”) of your life.
3. You’ll Catch Up On Those Zzzs
Committing to a Gratitude Practice can also help with your sleeping patterns, promoting a more restful night's sleep — one more thing you can add to your list of things to be grateful for!
4. Eliminated “Lack Mindset”
Most of us have experienced “lack mindset” before — it’s basically that nagging fear that you don’t have enough, you could run out of what you do have, or others are actively taking from you. Any type of “lack mindset” can cause anxiety, bringing your vibration down and leading you to make fear-based decisions. Practicing gratitude fights “lack mindset” by directing your focus to the things in your life that you do have, and are thankful for.
5. Boosted Resilience
We all know that sometimes life can become hard or challenging, and we’ve all certainly encountered obstacles in work or our personal life. But if you’re performing a Gratitude Practice, when faced with a challenge you’ll be better able to reflect on what you’re grateful for and what things are going well. This way, you’ll start to bring your vibration up and be less likely to give up when the going gets tough! A Gratitude Practice helps you shift away from feelings of depression or being stuck, motivating you to continue moving forward towards your goals.
The key is, that by feeding your Gratitude Practice, each day writing down some of the things you’re thankful for — your family, your health, that vacation you’re totally looking forward to — you’ll begin to realize what’s really important to you. In my opinion, a healthy Gratitude Practice is the single best way to really change your mindset, raise your vibration, and truly make yourself happier, more productive and successful. Remember with the right intent anyone can practice gratitude!
I hope my experience is helpful to you on your own path to a Gratitude Practice. And if you’re already practicing gratitude, please share how it’s helping you and if you have any other tips!
For more information on starting your own Gratitude Practice, and to watch the live video that accompanies this blog post, be sure to check out my Facebook group Alpha Female Sisterhood. There you’ll find tons of empowerment and support for high-performing women, just like you!
**Things That Might Be Harming Your Gratitude Practice And Ways To Amp It Up
We have heard so many times, "Time is Money."
But what if "Time is Love?"
So whatever or whoever we give most of our time to, it means we are giving most of our love to?
I spent many years of my life working 50-60 hours working for a big company that considered me as nothing but a resource that made the company profit. Then even after I started my fitness company, I was so busy growing my business, I was always at the studio or on computer working - and was too busy to be present for those who loved me.
I have recently come to realize that at least for me personally, time had to be love.
I chose to spend time and my energy in things that I wanted to give love to.
Myself, my family, my friends, my community, and my business - in that order, because to me, that's how love should flow.
If you had to live your life in a way Time = Love, how would you choose to live it?
I recently wrote an article for a local magazine CEO Magazine of RVA focused on empowering women.
Five Ways You May Be Sabotaging Your Health Goals
I had lunch with a close friend a few days ago, and had one of the most inspiring experiences...
Through asking right questions and listening, I actually had my introverted friend to share her passion, and explain in detail what makes her work so special, and how she experiences FLOW when she does the kind of work. And in having this inspiring conversation with my friend, I myself experienced my own FLOW, just sharing, exploring, getting excited, and encouraging my friend to pursue the passion to the next level...
What is FLOW? According to Wikipedia and psychology today...
In positive psychology, flow, also known as the zone, is the mental state of operation in which a person performing an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and enjoyment in the process of the activity.
Finding our own passion, gift, purpose that puts us in state flow and keeps us happy and dream big is such an inspiring thing.
Wouldn't it be great if we learned how we could help ourselves and others identify and make changes in their lives to live a life pursuing what they love and believe in?
Please comment here and share if you have your own passion that puts you in the flow, and what your life would look like if you could engineer a lifestyle that supports your passion.
I met Myrf through her sister-in-law, Meriel, who is also another kickass girlboss of Ozzy & Squish (my hair goddess). Meriel brought Myrf to one of my early morning fitness classes, and she is such a badass fitness buff, I immediately felt connected with her. When I found out that she owned one of Richmond's best interior designing firms, Decorum, for almost 20-years, I admired her even more.
While I'm surrounded by many like-minded women entrepreneurs, most of us are newbie entrepreneurs, having our businesses for less than 5 years. With Myrf being a successful girlboss for almost 20 years, she is full of insights and tips which helped me whenever I asked her for advice (she's become one of my best clients, friends, and advisers!)
And because I am a generous, share-the-love kinda gal, I asked her to participate in this Kickass Girlboss Blog Series, so you all can learn from her awesomeness, too!
How did you get started with your interior design business?
I actually worked as an interior designer, as part of a traditional company, for several years before deciding to break out on my own. I knew I had a lot to contribute and lots of great ideas but didn’t always have the opportunity to run with my ideas since I wasn’t in charge. Along with a coworker, we decided to break away and start out own business and have been working together ever since.
What is it like having a business partner?
Honestly, it’s great. I’m not sure I would have succeeded without her help and there were so many times we leaned on each other in order to get through (and still do!). We don’t always see eye-to-eye, but we communicate openly right from the beginning. Once we choose one person’s solution, there’s no looking back! We’re both Libras and avoid conflict, so we won’t hold a grudge or fight over that decision. We won’t let anything fester and that keeps our partnership strong.
When did you know you had something good?
Right from the beginning! Or at least, we thought we did. It never crossed our minds that our business could fail, or that it would be hard. In retrospect, we were a little stupid, but I think it was a good thing that we were so naive. If we had known some of the challenges we would face, we might not have gotten started.
Is there anything you could have done to make things easier?
We should’ve bought office space outright, long ago. We started by renting our real estate because finding the start-up funds to purchase a property is so expensive! In the long-run, we’d be money ahead by having an office to fully call our own, but we ended up making it work and didn’t have the stress of saving up that much cash or having to forego other investments along the way.
What is the hardest part for you with running your own business?
I really hate firing people. It’s great that we have enough work that we have a few employees on staff and I love working with most of them. Unfortunately, over the years, not all of them have worked out. Even when it’s obvious things aren’t working out, I don’t like being the person who has to let someone go.
The life of an entrepreneur often means very busy days with long hours. How do you make time for yourself?
I always remember that I need to take care of myself first and foremost. Being stressed or unhealthy will just make things harder. I love working out with my friends in the morning to get things off to a good start before stepping into the hustle of the day. That’s how I met Seo originally, but now our friendship goes way beyond a work-out session.
How do you push through the tough times and keep going despite adversity?
I’m a cancer survivor — and the #1 thing that taught me was to keep things in perspective. There are a lot of days when work can be challenging, but at the end of the day, I always focus on what’s most important to me and make sure that’s the priority. It really puts things in perspective.
Are you still working toward expanding your business? How?
When I have new ideas, I run with them. I created the Dip-a-di-do-da, a decorative dip container for parties and events. When I realized how often I was scooping dips into other bowls to put out for social events, I thought there had to be a better way. I started searching for an easy way to just place your dips into a decorative container and couldn’t find any after extensive searching, so I designed one. I sold out of my initial order of 500 pieces and continue to promote and sell the product.
Do you have advice for other people just starting out?
Remember that you might not find the solution in an obvious way. For my dip containers, I ended up asking around and got a producer because I knew someone who made plastic yacht parts. That probably wouldn’t be the first place I looked, but it worked wonderfully. Don’t be afraid to tell people about your endeavors or ask for help or introductions…you never know when it’ll help you along!
What do you love most about working for yourself?
I love controlling my own schedule. I don’t have kids of my own, but I still love spending time with my extended family and being part of their life and being able to attend special events. I also love that I can take advantage of meeting people out for coffee or carving out time for myself when I need it.
Meet Seo Kelleher, an intuitive coach for life and business, committed to empowering women. "I am passionate about helping women find the courage to transform their lives by embracing their vulnerability and taking the responsibility."